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Exclusive: âœPatriarchy Doesnât Go Away Just Because Youâre Educatedâ Says Arati Kadav

Mar 16, 2025

Arati Kadav’s Mrs, an adaptation of the Malayalam film The Great Indian Kitchen, has sparked a heated, yet much-needed debate on social media on the institution of marriage and the power dynamics between men and women. Known for her distinctive sci-fi narratives like Cargo and The Astronaut and His Parrot, Kadav stepped into an entirely different space with Mrs. Her film deeply examines gender roles and societal expectations. In a freewheeling chat with Filmfare, she opened up about adapting The Great Indian Kitchen for a North Indian audience, her creative choices and the larger themes she wanted to explore through the film. She also reflects on the evolving space for women filmmakers in Bollywood and why science fiction remains her true passion. Excerpts:

Where did the idea of adapting The Great Indian Kitchen come from?

This was a project set up by my producer Harman Baweja. The conversation of adapting The Great Indian Kitchen for the North Indian audience was going on for some time, and I was called in to evaluate. The film is popular and it enjoys a cult status, so I was worried that it will always be compared to the original. Sanya Malhotra was also involved in these earlier discussions. Then I started meeting a lot of women and realized how important and urgent this topic is. I felt that it is important that you tell this story in a way that is more accessible and relatable. After talking to all these women and knowing what they are going through, I felt that I have to tell this story with a lot of responsibility.

Did you take reference from your personal experiences while working on the film?

I have been married for 15 years and I experienced some of it in the early years of my marriage. Not that I can talk about that because there’s family involved in it, but there were moments in that film that have happened to me. Richa’s (Sanya) character likes eating food while cooking and I also have the same habit. I was told that I am making the food impure by tasting it while cooking.

Mrs Arati Kadav And Sanya Malhotra

Why was Sanya your choice for this out of so many actresses?

 

She has a lovely connection with everybody, but also she’s an amazing person. I’ve always liked her choice of films and she works from a place of deep empathy. She’s a very hardworking girl and gives her 100 percent. She had created a backstory for every scene.

Why did you make Diwakar’s character a gynaecologist? 

I know about a few women who are married to gynecologists like Diwakar. Knowing something for the profession and implementing it in your own life are very different. Patriarchy doesn’t go away just because you’re educated. Another thing I wanted to show is that Diwakar’s profession is perceived to be the maximum contributor to the society. So he has an ego about the fact that he is contributing a lot. And his wife Richa is a dancer. Society doesn’t respect dancers. Even when I was struggling for 15 years as a filmmaker, people treated my work as my hobby.

Which scene was the most difficult to shoot emotionally?

The intimate scenes were difficult for both Sanya and me, but more for her because she was in disbelief that women go through all these things. Her character was developed in a way that she doesn’t cry at all except for the times when she is fighting back for herself. Because it takes a lot of courage to fight back. That was difficult to do as well.

Decode the scene where Richa throws a bucket of sink water at her in-laws…

The pipeline breaking was a metaphor for what patriarchy is. The first time the water leaked, she did not realise it was broken. It is when she makes biryani but is not appreciated. I had very carefully calibrated when the first drop would fall. But when she met a friend who is with a more understanding partner, it was when she realised that the pipeline is broken. As her relationship with Dibakar gets worse, you can see the small bucket is replaced with a big bucket. And after a point she finally realises that the pipeline is fully broken. That time she says that the whole pipeline has to be changed. The idea was that it is not a cosmetic problem, the whole structure has to be changed. It was a very big metaphor for patriarchy or what she was going through.

Sanya Malhotra

Not many Bollywood films challenge the institution of marriage. Was it a challenge for you to do so?

We wanted to make sure that we don’t show anyone as evil. This is a very slippery slope. We can almost tell that the mother-in-law or father-in-law are evil. I had to control that instinct. I had to show that the setup or system is broken and is not favoring one gender, and that was the idea. I also wanted to show the difference between marriage and a wedding. We are living in a consumerist world, where people are celebrating weddings like it is the event of the century. I have a lot of criticism for that, because it is an unnecessary burden. Marriage is what happens after you are wed and come home. I wanted to tell people to invest in marriage, not in a wedding.

Having directed science fiction films, was it challenging to direct something completely different?

It empowered me to get into the details of this film. We are getting a lot of appreciation for small details. I am used to choosing every prop and every detail in the frame.  I referred to Morandi’s paintings for the palette of the film. I chose nice hand-painted tiles, tea cups, food items and all the other props. That training that I got while doing sci-fi helped me make this film in a slightly different way.

The original film had the Sabarimala temple verdict as an important point, but here that has been changed. Was it because people get too sensitive about religion? 

That is slightly a mandate. But we touched upon Karwa Chauth. A lot of us were very worried while mentioning it. But I thought that Bollywood is the unspoken sponsor of Karwa Chauth festival and we should definitely touch upon it. And this film was also a lot about Richa’s ambitions. In the original film, the girl was asked to delete a political thing on Facebook. But here I thought that’s fine. But our character asks her to delete her personal videos, which is completely erasing her past and in a way, erasing the only identity that she was holding on to.

And what was your biggest learning from this entire experience of directing this film?

My biggest learning, which I’d never got in my previous films, was working very strongly with characters and their graphs and working with the actors on every emotion. I had nothing else going on in this film. There’s no plot. It’s just about the character and their interpersonal relationships. I have grown a lot in terms of how I handle my characters and actors. I’m also very grateful that I had a good actor in Sanya, who was there helping me through this and working very hard.

Do you think that women filmmakers are finally getting their due and telling their stories?

I was so happy when I saw All We Imagine as Light and Girls Will Be Girls’ success. I have no words. These are such strong female narratives and so engaging. All We Imagine as Light also left an amazing footprint across the festival circuit outside India.  It inspired me and made me feel that I’ll also make a film like that. It is nice for women directors to finally have women directors as their role models. Otherwise, we always had to look for role models in male directors. 10 years back, when I was making my short films, there were barely any female directors. The ones that were there were extremely mainstream, and they all always used to feel connected to the industry. It is also nice to see women from outside the industry coming and making such amazing films.

Is mainstream Bollywood ready for stories that challenge regular beliefs, traditions and everything mainstream?

Right now, we are going through so much churn in terms of the mainstream. For the last two to three years, we have only been actively making male-centric masala films and calling it mainstream. We have made the mainstream very narrow. Someone in fact told me that out of 25 films, 22 films had a poster of a male actor with some weapon in his hand. But that formula is not working. There are big budget films with male actors not working. And then suddenly a film like 12th Fail, which has a male protagonist but not in a masculine way, is working. A sincerely made film with a good story can also be mainstream. That needs to change in the mainstream definition.

 

Do you think that the violence on screen has any real life repercussions?

I have been to film schools and seen Tarantino’s films so I can understand why that acts as a place of release for a lot of men. But the politics of it have to be right. If the politics is wrong, then it makes a lot of men justify a lot of things that they’re doing wrong in their life. It polarizes men and women even more. At least the filmmaker’s politics have to be right. The character can be flawed.

What’s your upcoming state of work?

I’m working on a few science fiction films. My goal is to go mainstream with science fiction and I am keen on doing that. That has been my passion for the last 10 to 15 years.

Why science fiction of all genres?

You can talk about reality more when you’re using science fiction as a device. You can talk about the problems of the world today by using those things. Science fiction is a very good way to bring magic back into the cinema. I believe in the magic of storytelling. I’ve always had a fascination for it since childhood.

Also Read:  Mrs. Movie Review: A stinging satire on patriarchy